Life Changing Dream!!!

OK, not TOTALLY, but it was pretty powerful.

The dream began as watching a movie about a woman, her son, and husband. Well, for some reason, the dad was trying to kill the kid!! Well SOME how, the dream became about ME and some mystery guy in a red and white old pickup truck. I ran and ran, but he was always there. Finally he was at my house!! I got my "kid" out and we RAN! Screaming for help, but for some reason, no one could help me.

Finally some older men came out to help. As we walked away, the killer came out ofthe house with a gun intending to kill me. Why?!!! Well turns out I'd bought his old house that he'd gotten foreclosed on and he was very upset when they took it from him. All well and good, but now he was gonna kill ME! So I was running. Running and he was going to shoot me in the back. Suddenly the men told me to "Stop running!" I was like "WHAT! He's gonna kill me!!"

They said "Trust God to help you. Just pray... And believe. "

Wellit took some doing, but I did it. And the man stopped. And broke down into tears. I went back and had to hug him. And we both just CRIED. Faith had saved me. And him also.

I was so moved, I woke up crying!! That has never happened before.

So I say that to say this. If worries and fear has you running and getting nowhere, stop. Pray. And have faith. Let a higher power handle it. :)

Jen

Oh Geez, what's happened?

Well, I'm still a dreadlocked lady person, and it's almost 5 years now!!! The 27th of August will be 5 years. My locks are getting pretty long now, and i have a job that requires me to wear a hair net.. But wait, there's more.. These hair nets are TINY! I have to put on like THREE which the cheap bastards make us pay for.. Well, it's OK, they are just 0.02 a piece, so.. But I'm totally cheap. LoL!

I've been using Suave Humicant shampoo and conditioner. It's totally cheap and works well, PLUS It smells great. :p Wonderful..

Ugh, I'm pressed for time, so this is gonna be so damn brief it's rediculous.

Ummm.. NO kiddies yet. I'm back to not preventing, and it may be that way until I'm just old and barren. Sure I still want a Mini Angel, but I guess it may just not be meant to be. Ugh... The BRIEFNESS!!!!!!!


I'm still smokefree! 8 months and counting. Wonderful.. Wonder when the smoking dreams go away. Weed is not included in my quit, however.. HOWEVER, I'm not smoked the chronic in quite some years. LoL! But if I could get it, I'd be all over that.. :p

Well that's all for now. Gotta go. :D

Jen

I Quit!!!

Smoking that is. I've been smoke free for 8 days and counting. I quit Dec. 13, 2009 at 7:30pm. It's hard. I haven't really had much withdrawal. But the habit is harder cause I was always smoking. When I was upset, happy, drinking. After I ate. The only salvaging fact is I only smoked in the car. I rarely smoked at home. So that makes things easier on me than the average smoker. I have the issues a person who smokes a cigarette a month or smokes for a week or two then quits for a year. Or a holiday drunk. Since you don't do it daily or heavily, you don't really feel that desperate to quit. If I wasn't trying to have a baby I'd probably never quit!! Basically it's ALL for the baby!! I'm not proud of it, but it's true.

Yesterday was the Solstice. I took a walk in the woods got in touch with nature. It wasn't intentional at all. DH was looking at a piece of property and wanted me to come along. I objected. I mean- it's the WOODS! Soft wet DEAD leaves. I hate stepping on wet ANYTHING. Well apparently it was time for this Christian/Wicca/Buddhist/Spiritualist to touch some nature. As we walked, through the annoyance I felt, I started to get more comfortable. And the woods felt... Peaceful. I believe if I'd been alone I could have got some real meditation done. :) Well when we left, I felt better. I kinda wanted to go back. I'm still not nature girl, but it wasn't so bad. I liked it. And at the time... I'd forgotten it was the Solstice. :) Just happened to be in the right place at the right time. Isn't that usually the way? The Universe puts you where you need to be. :)

Well, that's it. For now anyway. More as it unfolds. :)


Jen

Seeking...

I've been thinking a lot about Wicca lately, and wondering why I left that path. Of course I know there is no ONE true path that is the end all I wonder why I left that one. I won't make this long and drawn out. I was just wondering. I've been on a Buddhist path, a Rastafari path- basically i've been everywhere, man. :)

Well anyway, I've recently gotten back NEAR my path of peace & love. Hubby & I started our little produce business. I love the work, but there are a few customers who try my patience. I mean my prices are almost GIVE AWAYS!! But they want it nearly free!! I'm like apparently I don't need to live. I don't have bills. So just please! Take ALL my product for FREE. I'll just go live in a rolled up newspaper behind MacDonalds. Long as you have your 70 oranges 4 $.50!! Fantastic! LoL!

BUT I guess my first lesson is my best lesson. People will be people. Give 'em an inch and they'll take that inch and tell you last time you gave me foot and now they want a mile. To get through life sane you have to give til it hurts... Then STOP. otherwise there is resentment. But when the evils of the world get you down, just stop... Breathe... And realize no matter how nasty others are, it does not define you. You have to chose to be angry & nasty and only hurt yourself in the end. Or be at peace... And just look at them with pity and damn near KILL they ass!! Because grimmy ass people don't know how to deal with quiet, smiling indifference. :)

blessings, with hands together. {{Thats right.. I said it at the end. :p }}

Jen

I tried to post it on my BeliefNet site, but it ain't iPhone friendly. So I had to paste it here... Enjoy!






Well a year has passed since I was here and not much has changed. I haven't lost weight. Infact I'm totally at my fattest! Well, not fattest EVER, but still. I'm still searching for that path and I get a little closer everyday. I have a long way to go, but I am hopeful. I feel a good start is first stopping the hatred in my soul. Changing the way I see things & stop others from pointlessly flaming about stuff. Venting is great,  but not if you're sucking all the life outta the room. All the energy is wrapped up around your hateful rant. So I try to steer others clear of that and try to stay clear of it too. We're all human with emotions, but control and letting GO is the key to it all. 

Now if I can just get over this stomachache. It's getting better, but it's still pretty bad. 

If you don't mind reading mostly about babies and me trying to have one, you can follow me on Twitter. Just @BlackAngelP That'd be me. :p

BlackAngel

Weird...

It wasn't a big deal so I wasn't planning to even post.. But it got weird. So, in my renewed interest in listening to the Universe and knowing dreams can be very useful if properly decoded, I need to keep up with this. That and it they are just getting weird.


Night before last I had an Alice in Wonderland dream, with a slight twist. There's this show called Charmed and I watch it all the time so that explains some of it, plus i've studied Wicca for some time and DEEPLY believe in many mystical forces. Ok having said that, there was this.... BEING I guess would be the word, in my house. She could shape shift and was a bit of a prankster. Well I guess not PRANKS just messing with people. She had like a short brown bob and green eyes in human form. She hated the fact that she had to be kept a secret AND We had company WHO seemed to be looking for a scandel. Anyway, she changes into this big fat ass pink cat like the one in Alice. She starts smoking this cigarette or bong or SOMETHING and starts blowing these giant smoke rings across the room. Beautiful, but not good wen you're tryin to hide her ass!!! LoL! Well anyway I distract the visitors so the didn't see the giant pink smoking grinning cat, but then she changed. She wasn't evil really but she tried to destroy the two men. Like my spell wore off and she could "see" them now and kill them. I think I woke up before I could stop her or she could kill them. All in all it was a really cool, acid trip ass dream.


Last night I had a dream that I was a doctor in the hospital for some minor thing, bit several of us had a bad reaction to the medication and were wondering around high as HELL! They'd caught everyone except me and I was wil'in out!! I was wondering and hiding and taking allergy pills. Just goin' nuts!!! And that was fun. But the part that stood out was this girl. Kind of like the one from the Alice dream catches up to me and tells me to just "listen to the rain. You gotta just listen to the rain. " And I was like "Yeah man. You gotta just listen and let it guide you. " Amd she was on her way. Simple as that.

I kept dreaming after that.... Or before I forget which. LoL! But those were some acid trip quality dreams!! Wonder what I'll dream about tonight? Can't wait to see.


Jen

Cool..

Now I can easily post on the go. This iPhone app will definately come in handy. :)